My Choice

Today has been challenging.  There are those days that you wanta pull your hair out or hide away. lol


I know some people may not understand why I do what I do.  When my parents starting becoming ill, I decided that I would take care of them.  Yes I could have put them in a convalescent home but I chose to allow them to stay in their own homes and try to live as normal a life as they can.


No I can't work and do this.  It is work taking care of both of them.  Keeping up there meds.  Giving them out and making sure I refill them.  Then there's their doctor visits, and tests, and blood work.  Then there is making meals for them, getting groceries and budgeting what little money there is to spread far enough to feed us, and pay bills.  Scilla helps me.  I don't think I could do it alone.  There are times I have't to walk away and she has to step up.


Momma does a bit around the house but isn't able to do alot.  She gets to feeling too bad.  Daddy is like a kid again.  He forgets so quickly and asks the same questions over and over.  He stresses out over everything so quickly.  Then Momma gets upset and then they both are mad.  I play referee. It is a full time job, believe me.  I chose to do it though.


We struggle.  There are times that at the end of the month we get low in food, gas money and etc...  There are times that we have't to do without.  It isn't easy but when I think of what the alternative is....I regroup and know that this is for a season and we will make the best of it.


So I guess it isn't easy for everyone to do.  I know everyone can't stop their lives and stay home, many do not have the patience.  I just know that if it were me, I would hope my kids would allow me to stay home and be close to them in my elderly years.  


God always comes through for us.  He has never forsaken us.  My God is so faithful.  So I have't to trust that he will make ways out of no ways for us.


When the car needs work...he will provide....when we need healing...he's our healer.....when we need strength...he's our strength...whatever we need ...we find in God's presence.