Land Mines

In relationships, it is important to have really good communication.  We all have been through things that have left their marks upon us.  You can smell a certain smell and your mind will go to back to a memory.  You see things, hear noises that takes your mind on a journey to a certain experience in time.


Some memories are just that a memory, but there are the types of memories that set off a bad reaction.  These are often areas of ones life that haven't healed.  These are what I like to call land mines.  People around you can do or say something that set off these land mines.   


That is when you know that if you do have land mines, you need to communicate that to the person you are dealing with.  Explain to them what is causing your reaction to these episodes.  If you explain to them what sets you off, then they can know how to deal with you, in a more careful way.


For example, if every time a little girl got molested by her brother, he would bring daisies to her room, then if her boyfriend, now that she is grown, brings her daisies...her mind is going to go back to a bad place.  It is then a wise thing to explain why you don't like daisies.


With time, and God's help these things can heal, but still even after healing, they will not want to be visited.
Don't be afraid to be honest to share your land mines if you trust that person.  It will help your relationship to grow and help guide the other person as how to handle you.